A memoir of love, care, and the quiet courage of everyday life
Caring for someone with dementia — as a spouse, a family member, a professional carer, or a clinician — means walking a path that becomes more complex and more emotionally demanding with every step. Yet the part of the journey that needs the most guidance is the one where support is hardest to find: the long stretch between the end of mid‑stage dementia and the beginning of end‑of‑life care.
For our family, that period lasted nearly two years. It was a time of rapid change, difficult decisions, and constant uncertainty. We found ourselves searching for answers in a thousand places — many of them conflicting, many not UK‑specific, and none that described what daily life actually looked like. Like so many families, we were left to navigate the hardest part of the journey alone.
Looking After Lindilops was written to shine a light on that gap — and to advocate for better understanding and support for family carers. And it is also a love story — one that could only unfold because of the skill, compassion, and professionalism of the people who supported us. For those working in dementia care, the book offers not only insight into the family journey, but a reminder of the profound difference your work makes in the lives of the people you support.
Through scenes drawn from our family’s experience, the book follows Lynn’s journey from diagnosis to her final months — including the 18–24 months where guidance is scarce and families often feel most abandoned. Each chapter shows what happened, how we responded, and what I learned that might help others recognise what’s coming next. It offers something families rarely receive: foresight.
This website sits alongside the book as a companion — a place to understand the journey, find language for what you’re experiencing, and gather insights that support both emotional resilience and practical decision‑making.
Resources for Carers — recognise what may lie ahead
For spouse carers, adult children, and family members If you are caring for someone you love, you may be looking for clarity, reassurance, or simply the sense that someone else has lived what you are living. These pages offer scenes that help you recognise the changes ahead, explanations that make sense of what you’re seeing, and reflections that speak honestly to the emotional weight of loving and losing the same person at the same time. [Visit Resources for Carers → Link]
For Professional Carers — understand the family’s world
For home‑care workers, care‑home staff, and support workers You see dementia every day, but rarely from inside the family home. This section offers insight into the pressures, decisions, and invisible labour families carry between your visits — insights that can deepen empathy, strengthen communication, and help you support both the person and the family more effectively. It also shows the love story you help sustain through your professionalism and kindness. [Visit For Professional Carers → Link]
For Clinicians & Support Teams — see what happens between appointments
For memory clinics, dementia nurses, OTs, social workers, community teams, and allied professionals Much of the dementia journey unfolds out of sight, in the long gaps between appointments. These pages reveal how families interpret guidance, where support collapses, and how small interventions can make a profound difference. They offer lived experience that can inform reflective practice, training, and service design — and a reminder of the extraordinary impact your work has on the relationships you support. [Visit For Clinicians & Support Teams → Link]
The book also reflects a central truth I came to understand: educating the unexpected family carer is the fastest, lowest‑cost, most humane way to improve dementia care.
Wherever you are on the dementia journey — beginning, middle, or the hardest stretch — I hope what you find here helps you feel more prepared, more understood, and less alone. And if the book helps you see the road ahead with greater clarity, then Lynn’s story will have done what I hoped it would.
Read a sample
If you’d like to explore the writing style or the scene‑based structure before buying, you can read an extract here.
[Read an excerpt → Link]